How to avoid getting food poisoned

1. Do you always dine at Chinese restaurant because it is so cheap?

2. Do you find that the waiters/waitresses never smile at Chinese restaurants?

3. Do you find that the washroom is filthy or located in the most conspicuous places (i.e., near the storage area, down the stairs)?



If you answered "Yes" to any of the above questions then you are at risk of getting diarrhea. Your chances double for each "Yes" answered.

Here are the reasons:
1. In order for restaurants to serve cheap food, the cost of raw ingredients must be cost-effective. Restaurants owners will shop for the cheapest possible price. It doesn't matter where they get it, as long as it is cheap, they will buy it. Trust me, I'm Asian and I think like them.

Cheaper food means lower quality. Also, the food won't be washed properly. Water used to clean vegetables cost money. A penny saved is a penny earned. When I play video games, I am cheap too. Instead of taking the taxi in Grand Theft Auto, I carjack a sports car and drive it to my destination. If this holds true, even in a virtual world, then Asians are truly cheap people.

Anyway, as I was saying, lower quality food is more prone to harvesting bacteria culture as it may not be kept at the correct temperature (lowering temperature to save energy, thus money). Owners will hire a co-op student to clean for you because you can basically treat them like slaves.You can also blame them for everything because they are co-op students. You can also get a co-op tax credit on your tax return for hiring co-ops (only for corporations though).

2. Waiter and waitresses are paid below minimum wages. Why bother filing payroll remittances to the CRA? It is a lot of administrative hassle and the restaurant has to pay their portions of the Canada Pension Plan and Employment Insurance as well. Let's save money and just pay our workers cash. If you are paid below minimum wage, will you be happy? NO! Your other Asian fellow is driving a BMW, Mercedes, has the latest smartphone. While you bike to work and use a Nokia candy bar phone. At least it has Snakes.

Here is what Chris Rock has to say about minimum wages:

If the restaurants are paying you cash, it means that you are being paid below minimum wage, thus illegal. Chinese restaurants like to break the law.

So you will be disgruntled and treat the customers like trash. You will pick your nose in the kitchen and stick your finger in the soup bowl while serving the customer.

3. The washroom, where do I even begin? Just pick a restaurant close to home so you can do your business at your leisure while using your tablet.


To answer the title, eat at fancy and expensive Chinese restaurants, make sure the waiter/waitress is smiling when they greet you and don't use the washroom in restaurants. Or just keep reading my blog and see which restaurants are banned. (The latter is easier)